Decisions are LIKE Ocean Waves....

Life is like a wave sometimes you just have to ride it. Decisions are just like waves they ripple into your future. Each decision that you make impacts your future whether you like it or not. So choose wisely my friends choose wisely. Take the time to make your decisions with clarity and precision, otherwise your future will be a damn hurricane and no one likes to weather a hurricane. I would prefer to sit and sun bathe on a boat and take in the beautiful sun rays on a hot summer day versus sun bathing in a fucken hurricane. I know this is a drastic metaphor but this is the implications of our decision making skills upon our lives people. We need to take a step back and realize the impact that our decisions have upon our lives. In the immediacy of our decisions we don't always have the rationale to see this impact, plus our emotions play a major role in our decision making. However, the good old adage logic over emotion hasn't been around for so many years because it has steered us wrong. But we are only humans and we are susceptible to human error thus we are prone to mistakes. Plus mistakes are where we grow and become stronger individuals and life would be boring without mistakes anyways. I personally thoroughly enjoy a good mistake or two throughout my day it adds excitement in the mix. I am not a robot and I intentionally or unintentionally seek the thrill of the adventure of this so called life that we wake up to each day. Sensory overload sensory overload... so many emotions so many dynamics we are faced with and so much excitement that is constantly processed through this little dynamic brain of mine. 500 days of Summer each day each day.. It's truly an adventure everyday that I wake up and I hope that you too can embark on an adventure in your own life. I hope that my blog can inspire you to start your own adventure in your own life or you can just vicariously live your adventure through my life as I plan on making many mistakes because I am a nut job and I am sure my path ahead will be interesting and there are so many doors that I am sure will open and so many doors that I am sure will be slammed shut. But one thing is for sure I will speak what is on my mind and I am not afraid to be who I am and say what I feel. I will leave you with one last thing a Dr. Seuss QUOTE..

500 DAYS OF SUMMER......

Life is an interesting journey. You fall you get up and then you fall in love, only to have your heart broken. Damned if you do, damned if you don't. My life is an interesting journey, I must admit. People are intrigued by me or maybe they are just intrigued by my mind because they think I am bat shit crazy but I am not crazy at all I just have a beautiful intrinsic mind that sees beauty in all things. My life has led me down some pretty interesting paths, ask my family they have literally sent search parties after me. On the good days I have met movie stars, on the bad days I have met bums. However each person regardless of socioeconomic status has each touched my life in a special way because I have learned to looked inside to see each person's soul. I don't judge a person by the way they look I judge them for what is inside. Most people in society judge people by what they see on the outside but not me, not little ole 500 days of sweet Summer. Living in Vegas has jaded me. Everyone thinks that they are special or they have more money than you. They say their parents own this or they own that. Come on give me a break I don't really care I have heard it all. I have also pretty much seen it all. Nothing really phases me at this point in my journey. Superficiality has seen it's day in my reality which is truly a beautiful thing. I no longer chase the green to no avail. Ok fine I still chase the green because I am not perfect but I am getting better. In any case chasing the green leads to a path unseen. It goes no where it never ends because you will never be happy you will want more and more and more money. People wake up the only true happiness is internal happiness. Money gives you fleeting blissful moments it's never sustainable. I come from a middle class family that has broken into to the upper class realms within the last couple years, we live quite comfortably and people are amazed when they walk within our household and they are even more amazed when they see our literal breath taking back yard. We have a cookie cutter suburban yard and a magazine worthy view of the entire city of Las Vegas. My parents have worked hard to have everything that they have and I am not entitled to anything. I have to remember this simple fact when I get this sense of entitlement that many bratty kids get. Humility is the only trait that is proven to counter balance the brat syndrome. In any case I am beginning to take my own journey in life without my parents. In fact I don't want a dime from them I would prefer to take this chapter in my life without any help at all. I want to earn everything on my own because I enjoy the hard work and the effort and the gratification that comes along with that. I don't want people to look at me and think, oh her parents contributed to her position in life. I want them to look at me and think she earned her position in life. In fact I frown upon those who don't understand the meaning of poverty, those who have never struggled or searched for pennies in a couch cushion to eat or survived off of top ramen. Times like these truly build character in an individual. I have lived times like these and in fact I have even lived less glamorous times. However it is neither here nor there because I am learning and living each day and I am growing into a stronger more intelligent woman through these struggles.  I am a spiritual ninja learning tools like a warrior. Life is a struggle but with the proper lessons and wisdom life is a breeze. It's important to listen in life hear to these lessons. Quiet your mind long enough just as you would quiet your mind to hear the breeze among the trees. Until next time make a conscious effort to listen more and talk less you will be amazed at the transformation this simple method will have upon your life.

Rules of Engagement

A wise woman always knows her rules of ENGAGEMENTS if she wants a truly meaningful engagement Touche...

   1. Always choose a gentleman thats interested that values himself and doesn't use woman to make himself feel more superior he should have enough self confidence to feel secure enough within himself.

 2. Seem interested but not to interested. Maybe appear aloof and more interested in others. Men always love a chase. They always want something they can't have.

3. Don't be afraid to speak your mind. My brother is a very intelligent man and he told me that he looks for an equal. So a woman with equal intelligence is very appealing to the opposite sex.

4. Don't flirt with other men for attention. It's very unattractive and unflattering to the opposite sex. To an intelligent man it's an obvious indicator of low self esteem.

5. Good manners are always attractive.

6. That's all that I can think of at the moment. I guess I will have more lessons as I learn them until then have self respect and dignity. Don't see attention give your self attention and be confident in who you are as a person. Listen more and speak less. A good listener is always better than someone who blabbbs and  blabbs about themselves. This world lacks classy intelligent people some educate yourselves and make something of yourselves because it is never to late to start somewhere.. Goodnight its time to put on my pajamas and snuggle in front of the television set for some quality friend time and tv time.

Giving BACK TO THE COMMUNITY

So I spoke with my BOSS the other day and I felt like he spoke to me as if I was his own daughter. It was an amazing conversation. Such an amazing conversation that it still plays through my head even today on this fine Saturday morning. He told me that I should take more time off from work for myself, do what I need to, take it slowly, and work on myself. I said no I want to come back to work NOW!!!!!!!!!!!!! The problem with me is that I like to do things my way. It is always the Queen's way or no way at all! The thing that I am learning is that people truly care about me and that they want the best for me but sometimes I refuse to listen because I am too busy talking to ever hear anyone listen. There is a gentleman that likes me but I can't even stand him because he is so cute but he irritates me because he always right. But last night I took his advice and the conversations that I heard amongst the men had me in stitches. I guess I need to take the cotton out of my ears and put in my mouth for a second or two so I can take in the scene of all the beautiful things that are going on around me. In any case back to the subject of this blog giving back to the community, my boss suggested that I take more time off work for myself to focus on the things I enjoy, find myself and give back to the community. I find that when I help other people I truly feel happy. I want to give back to the community. With all this spare time I have managed to pick up. I am doing doing some freelance writing projects that I thoroughly enjoy. My next venture is giving back to the community. I will look to God to open an opportunity down that avenue. For now I will just pray and wait for an opportunity to present itself. Until then I will do my best to keep myself humble. God is good and life is GREAAAT!!.

The Diary of an Untmuted DRAMA QUEEN

Clarification is a key component in seeking a suitor for this young queen. Without clarification any young gentleman can easily be turned into a douche bag. A gentleman at heart soon blurs the lines of discretion and turns flirtation into child's play having his cake and eating as well. Well not with this queen and not on my time. I am a queen to be won and no prince will ever have a queen thank you very much. Take your peasant and take your rags because my riches are gold and your rags are not wanted in fact they are now the very plague to me. I know I am a bitch but I know what I want and I know exactly what I don't want. Thank you very much. Clarification is what I want and lack of clarification pisses me off. What man doesn't want a bitch. A man wants a woman who can put him in his place and if he doesn't than he is just a wimp anyways and he is wasting my time and his time as well. Thank God for blogging it is a place where I can get the steam off my chest without appearing as a complete bitch to the outside world. A place where a bitch at heart can vent all of her problems and appear as an innocent lady to the world. Men make me angry, especially men who really think that they can toy with other people's emotions. Well not at my expense because I am a bitch. I may seem sweet and innocent but don't mess around with my heart because you have another thing coming when you mess around with my heart. I am a woman and I know what I want and I get what I want and now it is clear to me that I was clearly wrong in thinking that I wanted to you. Lets be friends and friends at that is all that I want. I don't like how you treat women I think it's pathetic I hope you don't read this and if you do I hope you don't think I am talking about you.

The little birdie with COURAGE above the REST

There lived a little birdie who felt different from the rest of the nest. She was different because she had courage. She had the courage to express the emotions she felt in her heart. The courage to be genuine even if the other birds didn't like who she was. On the contrary, the other birds tried to fit in. To be apart of but not this little birdie. She knew who she was and she knew it was best to stay true to her heart. So she continued on walking to the beat of her own drum, even in this small confined path of the nest. Until finally one day, she realized it was her time to fly away. The day had come to go into uncharted territory. All of the birdies called her crazy. They called her crazy, even though one day they  too would eventually take the same journey. She ignored their comments because in her heart she knew this was the right thing to do. She felt a mixture of emotions but knew that her heart would never lead her astray. Her heart was the only thing she felt to be connected to God. So she went ahead and quieted her mind and listened to her soul. For days she ignored all the other birdies as they tainted her for having dreams of leaving the nest. This went on for about a week but she listened to heart and she listened to nature. Finally the day came when she took the leap. Thus she leaped and never looked back. She embarked on her journey of life. She pioneered leaving the nest that day and all little birdies grew to respect this birdie with courage. The moral of the story is have the courage to be yourself and listen to your heart.

A mother's LOVE- Either too much OR not enough....

A mother's LOVE can be either too much or not enough....

   Our mothers mold us into the human beings we become. The perfect analogy is a bird leaving the nest. My mother has hand crafted me remote control wings that she would like to put on me as a bird. She has a remote control for these wings. She would like to use this control to direct my every move. As a bird I am being controlled but in nature if you force things they naturally oppose. So this very situation is causing me inner conflict and chaos in my life. A bird should leave the nest as an adult. And as loving as her intentions may be they are harmful. So in order to grow, I must set healthy boundaries and let her know these boundaries assertively and lovingly. I no longer need these beautiful hand crafted wings or the remote control that goes along with them. I must use my own wings that nature has provided me and learn my own lessons as they come along. I must learn how to fly and I must fall on my own. I don't need her help any longer she needs to focus on herself and learn her own life lessons. Letting go of this codependency as harsh as these words may sound. On the opposite spectrum some mothers never teach their children how to fly so they are left to fend for themselves. These particular cases are extremely sad and these children become products of their environment, whatever their environment may be good or bad. Do not judge people be kind to them because you never know the circumstances surrounding their upbringing. At the very core of our existence we are products of our upbringing and ultimately products of our environment. Surround yourself with situations and people who serve you and your life will ultimately serve you as well.